“How beautiful is youth! how bright it gleams with its illusions, aspirations, dreams! Book of Beginnings, Story without End, Each maid a heroine, and each man a friend!”
-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Youth is wonderful! Those dreams you hold are still considerable possibilities for you. You still have the blissful ignorance of truth and you deem nothing to be impossible. However, as you age and get kicked out of your parents house(some never do), you begin to find out the reality of your situation. You have to let go of little pieces of your dreams... I really wanted to be a superhero that could cure any sickness...okay that's not going to happen I will settle for being a world renowned doctor...okay maybe not world renowned...okay too costly maybe a nurse,that is still helping people...you know what I have a family now and I need to focus on my kids, use my savings for their dreams instead. With that another dream just died in one of the common everyday people of the world. Do not get too down though compromising(a pretty word for settling) is part of the world, it ensures that no one goes home being totally happy or satisfied, but it also ensures that no one go home completely obliterated and depressed either(that's the good part!).
I am currently at that point in my life where dreams are getting further from my reach.(Not that it ever seemed likely that I would touch them anyway, it is still sad though) I have no money for colleage and I no longer know what to do with my life. I considered being a nurse, but when I told my family they laughed and said I wouldn't be "good" for that career because it involves taking care of people. I suppose they know me best and I do not want to agree with them but I do not believe a pessimist will do a bang up job of cheering a sick person up. I am considering political science as a major, but come on politics and government and the economy might be fun to learn about(just a tiny bit), having a career in that field though would give me a headache and probably make my hair turn white early. ( I refuse to dye my hair) I have even considered more "advanced careers", like wind or computer engineering. I would have liked my job to be more active though which is why I considered nursing in the beginning. Sitting at a desk or staring at whirly machines every day for hours would drive me bouncy. I am bouncy and bubbly at my current job because I like it there or used to. The peope are fun and entertaining and it is more laid back. I get to move around when the resturant is busy and relax and maybe sit and clean or talk when it is not. My resturant is not very busy usually. I honestly though can not make a living off minimum wage at a fast food place(plus it gets creepy if I work there until I am 40). I wouldn't be able to pay off my colleage loans interest rate so by the time I got out of colleage I would owe a fortune. I would then live in a crappy appartment and work at a crappy job with a little bit better pay or probably more than one crappy job, while I desperately searched for a career in my field that would make my life and all my hard work worth something(to me at least). And that is it, there goes all my hopes and dreams out the window and into the heaping black hole that threatens to swallow our entire being each day we are alive. What is life for and why work this hard to achieve pretty much nothing. This question is better left ignored otherwise that hole can suck you in. The happy people ignore it, be like them, it is usually best.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Parasites? Love? Trust Me I Can Make Them Relate.
"A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love."
- Henri B. Stendhal
"It is difficult to know at what moment love begins; it is less difficult to know that it has begun."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Love is a horribly evil little parasite, that slips into you unnoticed. There inside of you it feeds off your life and happiness, growing bigger each and every day. You will notice it eventually but it will be too late for you my friend, while you were busy making googoo eyes at the object of your affection, it grew until it consumed your entire being now the only ability you have is to sit and watch while it runs its course(wreaking havoc and making you look ike a complete idiot, more in likely). I am not a total pessimist, parasites can be good... they adapt and evolve very quickly... they help the host adapt and survive (of course its only so they can survive too). I chose a bad analogy, love can be a good thing. My "love" however is a bad, very very bad thing. So I have to know when to rid myself from this gigantic burden, believe me this thing has had time to grow for a year as said before(ugh). It has been to the freezers and came out with a girl(on top probably:p), so I decide that they should be happy together. Which translates into I have to give up on all my hopeless fantasies and schemes(darn). WOW! I gave up on my evil schemes so easily, I guess I am that much of a coward and very undetermined.
- Henri B. Stendhal
"It is difficult to know at what moment love begins; it is less difficult to know that it has begun."
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Love is a horribly evil little parasite, that slips into you unnoticed. There inside of you it feeds off your life and happiness, growing bigger each and every day. You will notice it eventually but it will be too late for you my friend, while you were busy making googoo eyes at the object of your affection, it grew until it consumed your entire being now the only ability you have is to sit and watch while it runs its course(wreaking havoc and making you look ike a complete idiot, more in likely). I am not a total pessimist, parasites can be good... they adapt and evolve very quickly... they help the host adapt and survive (of course its only so they can survive too). I chose a bad analogy, love can be a good thing. My "love" however is a bad, very very bad thing. So I have to know when to rid myself from this gigantic burden, believe me this thing has had time to grow for a year as said before(ugh). It has been to the freezers and came out with a girl(on top probably:p), so I decide that they should be happy together. Which translates into I have to give up on all my hopeless fantasies and schemes(darn). WOW! I gave up on my evil schemes so easily, I guess I am that much of a coward and very undetermined.
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Violent Delights
" These violent delights have violent ends,
And in their triumph die, like fire and powder,
Which as they kiss, consume."
Romeo and Juliet
act 2 scene 6
Tradgedies happen because someone wanted something and then fought to have it. They risked everything they should have held dear and did something out of the ordinary, something just a ittle bit crazy. Romeo wanted Juliet even if he did not know her and she wanted him for no other reason than it was love at first sight or lust at least. Now to hear about these occurences in novels or news are fine and dandy, you may even think that the creepy romantic escapades of the two were endearing and romantic, but truth be told, unless you are a little bit crazy(probably more), you would think it were creepy if some stranger came up to you with undying love in his eyes and a strange need to be with you until the end of eternity(vocalized by him). Of course, I believe that if you dial down the drama a bit it would be more realistic but drama is what makes a novel GoOd. So with that bit of philosophy in mind, I would like to inform you of my own violent desires. He has been my crush for about a year and I got to admit he is not at all an ideal person, but Romeo had his pitfalls too. Difference between a book and real life it the fact that I am going to do nothing about my crush, I will let it die. I know he thinks I am crazy and I know he does not care so if my life was a story,it would really suck.
StarGirl(code name) and I have been tossing around exaggerated plots for fun and she likes my idea of wrapping myself in a ribbon and appearing at the door with a note that says, "Take me for heavens sake before the cops arrive.". It is a mildly appealing fantasy, but again in reality it would definately come with a creepy undertone. Reality really does bite.
Sidenote: (It would be really embarassing if I got the wrong address, "sorry but this little present has someone else's name on it, don't be greedy now.", haha akward and I definately would not survive that little encounter.)
And in their triumph die, like fire and powder,
Which as they kiss, consume."
Romeo and Juliet
act 2 scene 6
Tradgedies happen because someone wanted something and then fought to have it. They risked everything they should have held dear and did something out of the ordinary, something just a ittle bit crazy. Romeo wanted Juliet even if he did not know her and she wanted him for no other reason than it was love at first sight or lust at least. Now to hear about these occurences in novels or news are fine and dandy, you may even think that the creepy romantic escapades of the two were endearing and romantic, but truth be told, unless you are a little bit crazy(probably more), you would think it were creepy if some stranger came up to you with undying love in his eyes and a strange need to be with you until the end of eternity(vocalized by him). Of course, I believe that if you dial down the drama a bit it would be more realistic but drama is what makes a novel GoOd. So with that bit of philosophy in mind, I would like to inform you of my own violent desires. He has been my crush for about a year and I got to admit he is not at all an ideal person, but Romeo had his pitfalls too. Difference between a book and real life it the fact that I am going to do nothing about my crush, I will let it die. I know he thinks I am crazy and I know he does not care so if my life was a story,it would really suck.
StarGirl(code name) and I have been tossing around exaggerated plots for fun and she likes my idea of wrapping myself in a ribbon and appearing at the door with a note that says, "Take me for heavens sake before the cops arrive.". It is a mildly appealing fantasy, but again in reality it would definately come with a creepy undertone. Reality really does bite.
Sidenote: (It would be really embarassing if I got the wrong address, "sorry but this little present has someone else's name on it, don't be greedy now.", haha akward and I definately would not survive that little encounter.)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
